Why You Should Talk About Your Last Day On Your First Day Of Ministry
It sounds preposterous! Why would anyone go into a new position at a new church and talk about the day you leave? It seems counterintuitive. But that's exactly what you should do.
Every church has an important leader who will eventually depart. It’s essential for churches to plan ahead for these transitions and prepare for a smooth, successful succession. This can be done by discussing the plans for the last day on the first day of ministry. Discussing this topic allows pastors to set up a framework for successful ministry, and maintain unity among the congregation. Let’s explore how to talk about your last day on your first day of ministry and how to manage transitions in leadership gracefully and effectively.
What it does for your congregation
Because tomorrow is not promised to us, it’s important to plan for the future. When you talk about your last day with your congregation from the very beginning, it helps your congregants to accept that there will eventually be a transition in leadership and also get comfortable discussing this topic. Somewhere along the way, we assume these positions are lifetime appointments. In the words of a Jewish proverb, "this too shall pass." We should be prepared for it and talk openly about it.
It helps foster an environment of open communication between church members and its pastor which is essential for a healthy and vibrant church. It also sets the tone for how your church handles transition in leadership, which can be very fragile if not handled correctly. With a plan in place, you’ll ensure there is no confusion or misunderstanding when it comes time to transfer leadership from one pastor to another.
What it does for you
The reality of ministry is that a pastor's tenure at a church may not last forever. In fact, the average pastoral stay these days is three to five years. When you talk about your last day from the start, it sets expectations for both you and your congregation that there will be a transition in leadership at some point.
I think we get scared that if we bring it up, it will be a reminder that we could be leaving soon. Whether the transition comes in the next year, five years, or twenty years, having "the talk" removes the stigma of the unknown. It's easier to think about transitioning if you plan for it from the start.
In addition, talking openly about your eventual departure can help you prioritize decisions and tasks as a leader. It allows you to focus on what’s important and leave a lasting legacy as you move on to your next ministry opportunity.
A mindset and culture of leadership development
Early on in my career, I had the fortune to work in an organization with a culture that indoctrinated me with the goal to develop my own successor from the first day in my role. The specific goal was, "What happens to the organization if you get hit by a truck?".
As macabre as that sounds, it forced me into the following strategies:
It forced me to identify potential "substitutes" or successors for my position.
It forced me to begin discipling my direct reports for potential leadership succession.
As I saw the wisdom of discipling "Timothys" to become "Pauls", I began placing this objective to each of my staff.
The fruit of this experience was the following:
As I did a deep dive into the background, gifts, and talents of my staff, I appreciated each of them more, and it allowed me to better align their responsibilities to their strengths and gifts.
I began to see how they could grow, and as I included their perspectives on their aspirations, I was able to mentor and position them to step into different leadership roles; sometimes my role, sometimes in different roles.
Evolving my management style from being supervisor into a mentor and coach led to a much closer relationship, characterized by lower turnover/enhanced loyalty, higher performance, and most importantly, a culture where people were nurtured and cared for.
Finally, many of my direct reports, over the years, were able to advance into various roles of leadership, some even eclipsing my own breadth of responsibilities...and I could not not be prouder when that happened!
Jesus talked about His last day
If you go through the gospels, you'll notice that Jesus talks about His last day multiple times. He knew what was coming and used each of His final moments to ensure that His disciples were prepared for the transition. For example, read from John 14:
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going."
He also spoke of His coming crucifixion:
"The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds." - John 12
Jesus was actively preparing His disciples for life after He was gone. It impacted His ministry as well. He was not simply doing ministry Himself. He sent them out. He trained them. He developed them. Why?
Because He knew it was not about Him staying, but rather equipping others to carry the work forward.
We can learn a lot from Jesus’ example. Being intentional about our eventual departure helps us stay focused on the mission of the church and builds an environment of sustainable leadership development.
So don't be afraid to have "the talk". Think about how you can prepare for the transition and make sure that your ministry is in good hands. The result will be a lasting legacy and an ongoing ministry of impact.
By thinking ahead and planning for the transition from one leader to another, you are setting your church up for success in the future. You have a chance to create an atmosphere of leadership development and legacy building that continues long after you've left
The importance of leaning into the uncomfortable
We generally don't like to think or talk about the future, especially when it involves us leaving. We may want to avoid this conversation altogether because of its potential emotional implications and discomfort that can come from addressing it.
But the truth is, talking about our last day isn't about saying goodbye. It's more about creating a healthy culture where we can discuss our goals and expectations, and be prepared for whatever comes our way. By leaning into the uncomfortable, we can create an atmosphere where everyone is comfortable discussing the future of church leadership.
It can actually be a good thing to create a vision for your congregation. Imagine saying, "I want to serve here for the next ten years. During this time, I want to see us grow in our faith, reach out to our community, and equip the next generation of leaders." You can certainly attach numerical goals to this vision, but it gives you an opportunity to let your people know where you are going and reverse engineer a path for getting there. By doing this, you are setting a great example for your congregation that will guide them through any transition.
It's never too late to start talking about the end
I've been doing a lot of traveling lately. My wife and I hadn't had "the talk" about what happens if I don't come back. We've always said goodbye as if it were the last time, but we never really talked about it. But lately this conversation has come to the surface and we've been able to talk through our expectations for each other.
It's not too late for you and your congregation to have "the talk" either. No one knows what the future holds, but being proactive about planning for the transition can help alleviate some of the anxiety that comes with change. If you're ten days, ten months, or ten years in, sit down with your elders and your lead team and start out by saying, "I won't always be here. I want to make sure I leave this place better than I found it. What can we do now to ensure that?"
The future of the church is in our hands. We have an opportunity to leave a lasting legacy and equip others for future ministry by being intentional about our departure from the start. By having "the talk" now, you are setting yourself and your congregation up for success. So don't be afraid to start the conversation. You never know what lasting impact it could have on those around you.
Remember: Succession planning doesn’t end at just talking about your last day - but rather extends far beyond this conversation! Be sure you are consistently taking steps each week towards ensuring successful turnover when the time comes! Keeping these tips in mind will help make sure you have everything planned ahead - leaving little room for surprises later down the road!
If you are looking down the road at a transition in your life, or the life of your church, AND, you need a safe and confidential space to have that conversation, let’s schedule a call. We have journeyed with pastors and ministry leaders to discern how to best have long-term vision and conversation regarding the ministry calling.
Matt Davis served as a Teaching and Executive Pastor for more than two decades in Orange County, California. After going through his own pastoral transition out of ministry, Matt learned the difficulty of this season. He helped start Pastoral Transitions, a ministry committed to helping ministry leaders navigate pastoral transitions with grace. As President, he seeks to bring healing a reconciliation to churches and their people.
